Motivation
Here is an interesting You Tube video I came accross to day. It speaks for its self!
Taking Control - Where do I begin?
Where do I begin to take control of my life?
Begin by recognising that whenever you take an action there will be a result. It may or may not be what you want but learning to look for what you can learn from the result of your actions is very powerful.
Think about something in your life that doesn’t seem to be working exactly as you’d like it yet and ask - what can I learn from this? And how can I use this learning to do something differently next time?
As you work on taking control of your life, it’s not unusual for a little self-doubt to begin to creep in.
This is completely normal so you can relax, after all if we were sure of every outcome before we took the action where would the fun be? It would be like going to the cinema and knowing the end to every film. So next time you find yourself doubting yourself or your abilities why not just take it as a sign that you are growing.
The fact that you’ve noticed yourself doubting yourself or your abilities is great because means that you can begin to work on turning this around now. As a first step just begin to ask yourself more empowering questions, such as: How could I use this doubt to help me move forward? How could you enjoy taking action today?
How do I control feeling overwhelmed, which leads me to procrastinate?
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Recreation
What is it? It may be elusive at the moment but let’s check it out.
Notice that this word, recreation, has the idea of “re-creating” in it. What does it mean to you to re-create yourself? If you could do anything you wanted and time, money and fear were not factors, what would that be?
Make a list of all the things you love to do. Then place a date beside each as to the last time you did them.
Make a list of all the things you loved doing as a child.
Make a list of all the places you’d visit if time, money and fear were not factors.
What would you do for fun and/or lifestyle if you won lotto?
If you could choose your vocation, what would that be?
Write your answers in a journal. These questions, if you give them the deserved thought, will get you to KNOW what you enjoy doing most.
Have fun!
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Success Involves Saying ‘No’
Part of building your character is to learn to say no. Many of us are people-pleasers, people who would rather do something they don’t want to do instead of telling someone no. If you do that in business, you’ll end up chasing your tail more than getting things done.
You can stay extremely busy pleasing people, both inside and outside of your business, and never get around to getting your business done or claiming the success you’ve earned.
No matter what the definition of success is there will be times when you cannot keep everyone happy. By actively and proactively managing your time and saying ‘no’ as needed, you can not only protect your time, but you can ensure that you move efficiently towards your dreams and goals.
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Building Success Through Your Character
Your personal character has the greatest impact on your success, because once again, you are your business. At Confident Future we believe that when a business is not doing well, look to the key people and help them ‘fix’ their lives. Then, and only then, will the business thrive.
Your character also helps define your attitude toward success. You have been defining your character all your life and your vision of success has probably changed as your character has changed.
Think about what success was to you when you were in primary school. Maybe it was getting good marks, being accepted by friends and being a great athlete. Or, it might have been to be like your parents, having a good paying job and being happily married with a family.
What was your vision of success when you were college age, or upon graduation? You probably had many plans for how you were going to make a success of your life. Perhaps you were going to find the job for which your education prepared you and start at a high salary level. Then you’d get married and buy a house; everything in the right order and going to plan.
After you’d been in the working world for a while, perhaps your idea of success changed to wanting to be at the top of your game, to perform well in whatever field you had chosen. Or, perhaps you were feeling out of control of your life and your idea of success had changed to getting back in control. This is where a Coach can help.
No matter what the definition of success is to you since your success comes down to your character you need to consider your character when you consider your success. And, you need to continuously build your character in order to continue on your Journey of Success.
It’s easy. . .
Building your character means overcoming your fears, getting perspective and talking things out. Fear will always be there, you just have to get used to them and learn how to work around them. If you focus on fear, it can overwhelm you. When you are overwhelmed with fear, your character is weak. You will soon find that to build your character, you must face your fears and put them into perspective.
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Building Success Through Balance
To build success, In addition to building your character you must develop yourself physically, mentally, spiritually, financially and socially. These five areas speak directly about WHO you are and your character. When any of these five areas becomes out of balance, your character becomes out of balance. For example, maybe you love to exercise but, as you get busy, you let exercise slide and you begin to feel worn down. This gets you out of balance physically.
If you are not dealing with your fears, you are out of balance mentally.
Being out of balance spiritually could be as simple as not looking at success from anything but a money perspective.
Being out of balance financially can happen to anyone and we should know how to get back in balance.
Being out of balance socially means that you have forgotten that you have family and friends, and have not kept them informed of what you are doing with your business or perhaps with your life. It may also mean that you’ve become disconnected from the social side of your business.
However you think you may be out of balance there will be ways to restore balance to your life. Working with a coach will assist you in clarifying this. You can down load unit one of “Life Management - Knowing what you want”, simply cut this address below and paste it after our home page URL: /coaching/self-improvement-units/life-management-coaching/life-management-unit-1
This will help find what areas are out of balance and where to begin.
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The Big Three?
What are the BIG three things that people want more of in their lives?
You got it. . . Happiness, Money and better Relationships.
How are you going in these three departments?
Are you as happy as you’d like to be? Do you have all the wealth you want?
Are your relationships as good as they can be or are you left a little wanting
in one area or another or perhaps all three?
Well the really, really great news is that YOU can have it all!!
Who said that you shouldn’t be rich beyond your wildest dreams, who said
that you don’t have a right to complete happiness and who was the dream snatcher who said you had to put up with mediocre relationships?
Don’t listen to any of them. It’s your birthright to have it all. I’m sure there wasn’t any one standing over the cots in your hospital nursery when you were born deciding which babies were worthy of the best life possible. . . so, what happened between birth and where you are now that changed this right or your perception of it?
How do you go about claiming what’s rightfully yours? How do you have all the happiness, wealth and outstanding relationships you could possibly want?
You simply don’t settle for less, you learn what it takes to ‘BE’ the best you possible; you learn to show up in your life as the most amazing individual and you never, ever settle for less than you are worth.
Understand that wealth has to be created in your mind first; happiness is a natural state and an attitude and relationships have to be cultivated and nurtured.
Getting what you want out of life involves going within. Go on this journey first or get used to life as it is.
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Living With Balance
If you feel that life’s hectic pace leaves parts of your life lacking and that you’d like the merry-go-round called life to stop and let you off, you are not alone!!
Help is at hand and there are ways to tip the balance back in your favour.
There’s nothing new about the idea of work/life balance, although, for many of us, it can seem elusive as we try to keep everything together on the treadmill of life. The question to ponder, though, is “What do you do when you can’t keep up and the quality of your life suffers?”
Firstly, it’s important not to compare your life with others but to get totally honest with yourself about what it is you want out of life. Self awareness is the key stone to achieving life balance and making choices based on what’s best for you.
To start getting your life back in balance, we suggest you make a comprehensive list of everything you do in your week. Include the time spent with family, friends and at work. Remember the time spent watching TV and surfing the net also. The next step is to reflect and decide what you need to be doing with your time in order to feel happy and fulfilled. A great way to do this is to go out in time and do the ‘Rocking Chair Test’. That is, when you are 95, sitting in your rocking chair, and looking back over your life, what will you be grateful for and what will you regret not having done?
There are not too many people, who, when on their death beds, regret not having worked harder or having spent more hours at the office!!
Having done that, decide how can you better spend your time, (the one thing we all have the same amount of in each day), what do you value and what decisions can you make based on this so that you can live the life of your dreams and be the best you can be?
Sometimes change can be frightening and it can seem easier to maintain the status quo. That’s why with a Coach you’ll never be alone. They can guide and steer you in the direction that you truly want whilst giving you support and keeping you accountable for ‘real’ change.
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Falling in Love
There’s plenty of advice and rules around for getting a girl to fall in love with you. This is not about those rules and advice. This little article focuses on the basics that can be used to strengthen a girl’s feeling of love for you. Love can’t be forced. It has to take it’s course.
Things You’ll Need:
- Patience
- Kindness
- Respect
- Sincerity
- Honesty
Step 1
If you want a girl to fall in love with you, just make her the center of your respect and admiration. Treat her well and do things that you know will make her happy. A girl will most likely fall in love with a guy when she knows she is important to him. Make her smile, make her laugh, and show her that she can be happy with you. She’ll fall in love with you because she feels happy when with you and when thinking about you.
Step 2
Offer her your support and friendship. Falling in love is about offering her a shoulder to cry on, someone to talk to, and a friend to be there when she needs one most. A woman will find it hard to open herself up to a man who cannot be her friend. In order to fall in love, a woman needs someone who will listen to her fears and troubles and know that you’re being sincere. Remember, it’s not all about you. Letting go of your expectations will also help you relax, which will make you more appealing to a girl than if you are uptight and worried.
Step 3
Give her lots of attention and lavish her with love. If you want a woman to fall in love with you, you have to show her how much she means to you. Telling her how you feel is great, but showing her your love is the key. Kiss her often, cuddle her, and do sweet things for her like making dinner, giving her a massage, or buying flowers for no particular reason. When a woman knows how much she means to you, she feels secure and this increases the chance that she’ll fall in love with you.
Step 4
Show her that you’re a sincere and genuine man. A woman needs security to fall in love, just as anyone does, and if you show her that your feelings and intentions are real, she’ll be more likely to fall head over heels in love with you. A woman knows when someone is not being true…it’s called woman’s intuition. So, if she senses you’re not being genuine with her, she will not let you in. If you’re honest and real with the woman you care for, she’ll offer the same in return and love will blossom before you know it. Love is patient, kind, and honest…treat the woman you care about with respect and be true to her…she’ll love you for putting her feelings first and give you the same or more in return. Love thrives in the absence of pressure (in the form of neediness and clinginess).
Step 5
Give her space. This step can be looked at in many ways and can get distorted easily. It isn’t about playing hard-to-get. The point is to give the girl the control of what happens next. This step isn’t about ignoring her so SHE has to call you, or avoiding long conversations with her to torment her into loving you. Just allow her to live her life outside you. Allow her to see a movie without you. Allow her to be without you and she will then decide to love you on her own terms.
If you’re shy, you might end up giving her too much space. You still need to express your interest in her (flirt a little, and when the time is right, kiss her). Just don’t smother her. Give her some time to reflect on those moments and realise how awesome they were.
Further Tips:-
- Be yourself and don’t try to be someone else to make a woman fall in love with you…she’ll see through this and know you’re not being sincere…if she’s going to love you, it will be for the person you already are.
- You can’t make someone fall in love with you…so if it’s not there, don’t force it…love comes naturally.
- Don’t get angry if your partner hasn’t said “I love you” yet…love takes time and needs kind encouragement to flourish.
- Don’t be afraid to fall in love yourself…you can’t have someone fall in love with you if you are not the falling in love kind. . Love often starts with friendship and often comes with time, and in that time you need to show the girl that you are worth being around. This is the fun part! The only way this will work, though, is if you believe, on some level, that you are lovable and worth being around. It’s very difficult to fall in love with someone who thinks badly of themselves.
Once in love, your relationship has to be nurtured and respected. Love is only one part of a healthy relationship–the rest depends on effort and patience.
Now that you have got to the end of the article you might be thinking I knew all of that. But now go back, take your time and truly ask yourself the questions:
- When was the last time I bought flowers for no reason for someone I care for or love?
- When was the last time I was there for some one who needed support?
- When was the last time I cried with laughter with some one I love?
If you can’t remember when, look in the mirror, ask yourself who you could show your love to first and how could you express that?
Remember: The more you give out the more you will receive and it is never to late to say “I love you”.
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Communication Process
Communication is the means by which people share words, ideas and feelings. When you explain an idea to someone, you are attempting to share that idea. If your communication process is successful and as a result you share that thought, it is then something that you and the other person have in common.
Sharing ideas helps people relate to each other more effectively, to work together more happily and to get jobs done faster. Effective communication makes life work.
But is that all there is to communication? What is really going on? When people say they are communicating are they only talking about sharing ideas?
How Communication Works
The illustration here demonstrates the concept of communication in its simplest form. Of course, this diagram shows a message travelling in only one direction, when in fact most communication involves two-way exchanges.
Different Ways of Communicating
Each type of communication listed below needs different skills and techniques.
Person to person -
face-to-face, reading a letter, making a phone call, dancing;
In a small group -
planning, solving problems, making decisions;
In a meeting -
presenting, bargaining, negotiating agreements;
In an organisation -
writing reports and memos, using notice boards, supervising, managing;
Through the mass media -
speaking in public, on radio or television; writing for the media, in papers, journals, books, advertising and public relations;
Others - training or teaching, entertaining (art, cinema).
It Takes Two to Communicate
The word ‘communication’ and similar words such as ‘community’ and ‘communion’ all have Latin origins describing the idea of ‘common-ness’, the result of sharing ideas, having shared understanding or reaching a common agreement.
To be described as communication, an exchange must involve two or more individuals, although not necessarily humans. Most living creatures communicate, but you cannot share ideas with a machine. Computers are used to communicate, but having no ideas of their own they cannot communicate with you or among themselves.
Main Elements in the Communication Process
Defining the steps involved in communication is complex, however the main parts of the process and the terms most commonly used to describe it are given below:
Who communicates?
- A sender and a receiver.
What do they communicate?
- Messages, codes and meanings.
How do messages travel?
- Via channels.
How does this happen?
- The sender has an idea and converts the idea into a message. This message is sent or transmitted and is either received or ignored by receiver. The receiver interprets the message.
What else happens?
- The receiver responds or reacts; the sender receives feedback.
The Message
A message is a unit of communication. It starts as an imaginary package that carries a meaning. Some messages are portable - for instance, a memo being passed from one person to another. Others are transferred visually - a smile, or a raised eyebrow. A handshake travels by touch. All these are messages.
In our Success Strategy for Life on Communication we go into the communication process in great detail helping you understand what it takes to be a truly great communicator, how to get your message across first time and most importantly to have those around you feel understood.
Would you like to receive the first unit in this Success Strategy for life? If so fill in the box below and we will send you your Free link to: “Communication - What did you say?”
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