It with great regret that we are closing Confident Future down to new clients. Until further notice we will no longer be scheduling new training events or accepting new students for our online NLP training course.
Lloyd’s health has been less than perfect since mid-2012. A serious problem with fatigue was at first believed to have been caused by several viruses, although more recently the doctors have identified it as Idiopathic Hypersomnia. This is a rare condition that causes extreme sleepiness without known cause. The treatments that exist are only able to help with the symptoms and unfortunately they’ve not proven effective in Lloyd’s case.
The doctors do not believe a recovery in the short-term is likely so regrettably Confident Future will need to remain closed until Lloyd’s health returns.
In the mean time, Jenny in South Africa continues to be available for our existing students. Jenny can be contacted to study NLP via a set of Confident Future DVD’s. Jenny is also available for guidance and certification. To contact Jenny please email: jenny@confidentfuture.co.za
Sharing NLP online with people like you has been a dream of ours for so long. It is our greatest wish that Lloyd’s health returns in full so we can continue Confident Future from where we have left off.
With best wishes,
Lloyd and Jenny
The Confident Future Team
The Internet is full of people talking about Influence, Persuasion and how to use NLP or Hypnosis to ‘control other peoples minds’. And most of the ideas presented are just regurgitated from other sources, or plain fantasy. But I’ve just been taking a look at a Sneak Preview of something called the Intelligent Influencer. The first video that I watched is paradigm changing and I want you to check it out:
» Visit the Intelligent Influencer by Judy Rees
The video I watched started to share research from 2010 that PROVES that Influence doesn’t just take place in our minds. In fact, the research suggests that influence starts first and foremost in our bodies. I found the implications of this totally fascinating. NLP and Hypnosis put so much importance on the spoken word and how it can be used to influence the Unconscious Mind of others. But what this research suggests is that there are more important places to focus first.
What I especially loved was the example Judy gave in relation to influencing someone in a Job interview environment. But rather than trying to do it justice through the written world how about you check it out for yourself? I think the Sneak Preview will be available for seven days to those who are interested, so put your name down now and enjoy the first video.
» Gain access to a free Sneak Preview of the Intelligent Influencer
Have you been dreading the thought of an upcoming presentation at work? Are you giving a speech at an important event like a wedding? Or is it that time of the year where you need to give a presentation in front of your class at school? Never fear – this simple exercise is all you need to totally let go of that anxiety. With some imagination and a little bit of time you can totally let go of that anxiety once and for all.
You see, the human mind works in a really reliable way. To produce anxiety what one must do is produce images/videos/sounds in the mind of an event going badly. The worse you imagine it going, the greater the feelings of anxiety.
Speaking broadly, there are two main types of anxiety:
- Specific Anxiety
- Generalised Anxiety (Sometimes called ‘floating’ anxiety)
In most cases of presentation anxiety it will be a specific anxiety about a specific presentation in the future. There are two factors at play with a specific anxiety. Firstly, there is the imagination of the event going badly. But sometimes there are also many past experiences of it going wrong. These past memories form a Gestalt and this Gestalt can give power to the anxiety.
Letting go of the Gestalt can be done with NLP and a specific process called Time Line Therapy(R). But in most cases for specific anxiety it isn’t necessary. What is going to have the greatest immediate impact is consciously vividly imagining the event having gone well.
Here is what I want you to do:
1) Think about the presentation and on a Scale of 0 – 10 (Where 0 is no feeling and 10 is the worst you’ve ever felt) write down how bad the feeling is
2) Vividly imagine, in your mind, 15 minutes after the presentation with the presentation having gone really well. Pay attention to what you see, what you hear, how you feel and any smells/tastes that are important. Make sure you are imagining this through your own eyes.
3) Now, think about the presentation again. Same Scale of 0 – 10 – write down where the feeling is
4) Repeat Steps 2-4 until Anxiety is at Zero
This process of imagination should take 30 seconds to fully and vividly imagine it going write. Sometimes it also helps to vividly imagine the event going well up to 15 minutes after (i.e. play through in your mind your presentation, what people say when you’re done, the praise from those around you and all the way until you’re in your car driving home etc).
This technique is one I’ve shared with dozens and dozens of clients. It may sound too simple to be true, but getting on top of your anxiety can really be as simple as those four steps above.
Shortly after sharing this process with a client I received this written reply:
I am eternally grateful to you for this advice. Immediately after I read this I did the exercise and the effect was immediate. My anxiety was not completely eliminated after the first few exercises but I continued to repeat the exercise over the next few days every time I caught myself being even a little bit anxious. The result was phenomenal.
I slept like a baby last night when normally I don’t get an eye shut before a big presentation. Going into the presentation today it was almost unnerving how relaxed I was. The presentation went amazingly well! The feedback I received from my executive director was even more positive than I had imagined.
Thanks so much Lloyd. I am more stoked than ever about my NLP learning.
- D. (South Africa)
You may also want to put some thought into the other areas of life you could use this technique in. It will work for much more than just anxiety about presentations!
So put this to work and share your results – emails are always welcome or leave a short comment below.
Do you find it difficult to have difficult conversations at work? Join the club! The bad news is – most people find it difficult to have open, honest conversations at work, particularly in the following situations:
- Opinions vary. You’re talking to your boss about your career. He/she thinks you’ve still got plenty to learn where you are, and you want a promotion.
- The stakes are high. You’re in a strategic session with your colleagues, and you’re trying to determine the direction of the company. Making the wrong decision will have serious consequences.
- You’re under pressure. You’re in Sales, with some tough targets, and you’re taking strain. A colleague in Administration has just told you your orders can’t be processed due to your shoddy paperwork. You feel like exploding!
So how do we typically handle difficult conversations?
According to Joseph Grenny and Kerry Patterson in their book ‘Crucial Conversations’, when we face difficult conversations, we do one of three things:
- We avoid them by walking away.
- We face them and handle them poorly.
- We face them and handle them well.
This seems pretty straightforward. We can walk away from a difficult conversation and suffer the consequences. We can handle it poorly and suffer the consequences, or take the best option, which is to have the conversation, and handle it well. So how do we do this?
Using some of the techniques from our online ‘Learn NLP Anywhere’ course, here are some ideas on how you can take the lead and create change – one conversation at a time:
- Get into rapport with the other person. This means creating a state of mutual trust and respect between yourself and the other person.
- State your positive intention and desire to work things out. “My reason for getting us together is to find a win/win solution to the problem we’re having with missed deadlines.”
- Ask the other person what their positive intention is. This could be, for example that they want to ensure the expectations of clients are met, whilst not compromising on morale within the department.
- Explore options, and find a common intention on a higher level, that will satisfy both of you. This also involves deciding on what you can both live with and what you can’t live with, and deciding on what you are willing to let go of to move forward. “So what we both want is to deliver on our promises and create a happy working environment, which we can do by introducing flexible working hours”.
- Use Perceptual Position to put yourself in the other person’s shoes. See, hear and feel the conversation through the eyes and ears of the other person. If you do this well, you will get a sense of what the other person believes and values, which will help you become more empathetic to the other person’s needs and wants. You can also explore the situation through the eyes and ears of a neutral observer, a fly on the wall, a hidden video camera. When we add these new dimensions to our own perspective, we learn new ways of behaving that will enrich and enhance each and every relationship we are in.
- Use great questions to open doors. A great question is influencing, without being controlling, and rapport is important. Examples are: ‘Can you tell me a little bit more about the importance to you of a becoming a manager?’ ‘What is it about becoming a manager that’s specifically important to you?’, ‘Is there another position which could satisfy your needs?’
- Learn from the experience. Ask yourself, in hindsight, how would you do things differently? How could you choose to think/feel/act differently? You could also ask yourself what you could do, to prevent a similar situation from happening again.
- Agree on specific actions. Whatever you agree on, deliver on, and move forward with a positive spirit.
Change is often a challenge, but once you commit to improving the quality of conversations in your workplace, you’ll be amazed at the results. One person truly can make a difference!
Want to learn more about using NLP? Then make sure you check out The Secrets to Learning NLP and the accompanying free video series by clicking here:
» Get Started Learning NLP Online
This post has been written by Jenny Wensing, Confident Future South Africa.
» Learn More About Jenny Wensing
Online learning is hot. And for very good reasons. If it is done well, it produces phenomenal results, whilst offering massive benefits.
Here are some of the advantages of online training:
- Flexibility. You can learn any time anywhere. Online learning can be done at home, at the office, on the road, in bed if you like whilst wearing your PJ’s , 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
- Cost effective. Since online learning can be done from any geographic location, and there are no travel and accommodation expenses, this type of learning is much less costly than the traditional training. NLP Practitioner courses in South Africa, for example cost around R16,000, and in the U.K. around £2,500,and in Australia it would cost around AUD$4,000. For a fraction of the price you can study NLP online. For example, the Confident Future online NLP training course costs only $497 US.
- Personalised learning. Look out the window at the car park. My guess is you’ll see a dozen or more different types of cars. They will all get you from A to B, yet we all want the journey to be different. The same for learning. Learners want to be in the driving seat. Online learning is all about empowering learners with options and choices on when they learn, and how they learn.
- Ongoing access to resources. If you go on a traditional course held in a training room, you’d better be wide awake. Otherwise, you might miss something important. That’s not the case with online learning. If you find yourself drifting off, you can go back to the online content and resources whenever you choose.
- Knowledge management. Many people see online learning as only downloads of PDF files. But the best online learning includes all sorts of multi-media experiences, including video’s and opportunities to share and connect with other learners via Facebook and other social media forums.
- Self paced learning. Ever been on a course, where the pace is either too slow or too fast for you? With online training, you work at your own pace. So, if you grasp some of the concepts really quickly, you can move on to the next segment straight away. If there are other sections which you need to spend more time on, you can, and without that feeling that you’re holding up the rest of the group.
- Retention: Since people learn at their own pace with online learning, retention rates are often higher than in a training room environment. With the best online learning systems in the world, learners have access to coaching and can interact with other students.
- Freedom to fail: Let’s face it, real learning requires some failure. But no one likes to fail in a training room full of other people. Online learning lets you fail (and therefore learn!) without fear. This encourages exploration and testing of ideas.
- Learning styles. Most people don’t learn from simply hearing the content, but by seeing it in action, and doing something with it. In a traditional training environment, too much time is spent listening and not enough time doing.
- Environment. Online learning is good for the environment. A study conducted at Britain’s Open University found that producing and providing distance learning courses consumes an average of 90% less energy and produces 85% fewer CO2 emissions per student than conventional face – to face courses.
So – online learning makes sense. It is cost effective and can produce fantastic results. It’s all a matter of how it is designed, and when and how it is used. Would love to hear your thoughts and experiences. Feel free to leave a comment below.
A post by Jenny Wensing, Confident Future South Africa.
Confident Future was recently featured in Hallo Magazine, a Spanish magazine for Dutch Expatriates. Jenny Wensing’s recent article on 2020 was translated for their readers.
Click the image below to view the article in full:
What do you do with your goals after you set them firmly in your future? Do you write them down? Do you create a vision board or is having them in your mind enough for you? This video shares a straight forward technique known as a Goal Book. It is a place where you can place all of the goals that are important to you. Plus I share some tips on what to do with your goals once you complete them. Watch the video to find out more:
An article by Jenny Wensing, South Africa.
We are living in an era of unprecedented change. Technology has connected us into a 24-7 non-stop global community, business cycles are faster than ever and stakeholders require instant responses in the midst of turbulent market conditions. This is all happening against a backdrop of profound structural change at all levels in society, politics and economics.
According to global surveys conducted by authors Jeanne C. Meister and Karie Willyerd, and Futurist Graeme Codrington’s research, the following key trends will have a dramatic effect on workplaces for the decade ahead:
- Shifting workforce demographics. People will stay longer in the workforce, meaning that five generations of employees, from vastly different backgrounds will need to work together in collaborative teams.
- Globalisation/virtual workplaces. By 2020 experts forecast that BRIC nations (Brazil, Russia, India and China) will be leading the world economically, and there will be a migration of talent to these parts of the world.
- The digital workplace. The realm of digital information is constantly growing. There will be an increased demand for employees who can manage vast amounts of data, whilst keeping it secure.
- Use of mobile technology. Moving beyond communication, mobile phones will also be used extensively as training and educational devices.
- Hyperconnectivity. The current Facebook, and instant messaging trend will continue, keeping people constantly in touch.
- Knowledge economy. Knowledge is now doubling every 3 – 5 years. The demand for communication and relationship building skills, as well as technical skills will increase.
- Participation society. Consumers and employees will collaborate via online collaborative groups to improve products, services and business.
- Social atmosphere. A highly engaging social atmosphere will dominate future workplaces. 2010-2020 is also the decade for social networking, social media and social learning.
- Corporate Social Responsibility. CSR, already a key trend in large companies will be even more important in 2020.
- Millenials in the workplace. Wired since birth, the Millenial Generation (people born between 1977 and 1997) will make up nearly half of the workforce by 2014.
- Blended lifestyle and flexible working arrangements. We will continue to see the breakdown of the traditional office with ‘normal’ 9 – 5 office hours. There will be more flexibility and work-life flexibility will replace work-life balance.
Buckle up for the ride!
Each of these trends, and many others will shape our world in the next few years, bringing both threats and opportunities. The key is to be prepared. By 2020 the global talent shortage will be acute, and employees will expect their workplaces to reflect the following:
- Opportunities for lifelong, virtual learning. Tailor made career paths, and lifelong learning in emotional competencies as well as technical skills will be the norm. ‘What learning opportunities are provided?’ may well be one of the key questions job applicants pose in 2020.
- Honesty and dishonesty. There will be a greater demand for transparency, and honesty and dishonesty will be quickly noticed in the social media environment.
- Innovation. In a rapidly changing world, innovation is the key to survival.
- Social connection and collaboration. The 2020 workplace will be characterised by sharing and the forming of communities at all levels. Social media tools will be leveraged to network, collaborate and brainstorm concepts.
It was Peter Drucker, the management author who said: ‘The greatest danger in times of turbulence is not the turbulence, it is to act with yesterday’s logic.” The most important first step in responding to these changes is to change how we think, and to explore the many exciting opportunities these workplace trends present. Brace yourself for an exciting journey!
One of ways that you can really help yourself is to make a habit of creating time for yourself. But sometimes that is easier said than done. In this video I share how I have been making time for myself lately and some ideas that will help you do the same.
Please leave a comment if this spoke to you or if there is a particular comment you would like to see covered in a future video.
This video shows how valuable NLP Values truly are (Excuse the pun) and gives an overview of the process involved. Enjoy and please leave a comment with your thoughts.
